Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Dating a New Boy

If you follow me on Twitter, you would know that I've been dating a new boy. Yes, he comes from eHarmony, which I signed up for a few months ago. Things are progressing slowly but very well. He's cute, fun and might talk more than I do! (Even though he's the texter and I'm the caller, haha.)

We've been on six dates and have had some impromptu hang outs apart from those. Our first two dates were prior to my 10 day vacation and they were great! Both times he took me to really nice restaurants and both times we talked for ~4 hours, usually the last ones left, barely even noticing that the places were empty! The waitstaff simply left us alone to chat. He's cooked for me once and I've cooked for him, we've gone out to a movie and more recently, we had an awesome Friday night date which included mini golf. :)

As someone who knows that dating can be expensive, especially from a guy's perspective as they tend to pay for the first few dates, I always offer to pay on the third date. Most guys will let me pay for part of the date after I've insisted. New boy has only let me pay for the movie on our fourth date (after much grumbling by him and insistence by me!) as well as the ingredients when I cooked for him, since he had no control over that. (Oh, but he did offer to pick up anything I might need.) When we did three different activities on our most recent date, I offered to pay at each part and he turned me down every single time!

The thing is, I know he has a well-paying job, so he can definitely afford it. (I did notice he pays with his debit card all the time, so that's a good thing.) But it's the principle of the matter! As a PF blogger who is in tune with my own finances and tries to be mindful of others, it does bother me a bit... but then again, it feels really nice to find someone who is successful, so giving and such a gentleman who wants to take care of me. :)


Ness November 23, 2010 at 10:53 PM  

Good job Maus :) He sounds sweet

Frugalista November 23, 2010 at 11:54 PM  

enjoy it! i felt the same way when hubby and i started dating. he spoilt me and i was not used to being taken care of AT ALL! There will be plenty of time to get back to a more equitable arrangement if you so decide. new romance is such fun.

Maureen November 24, 2010 at 4:19 AM  

It,s years since someone treated me to a lovely Restaurant because when Hubby and I go out we use joint finances. Enjoy it.

Amber November 24, 2010 at 9:46 AM  

Yay!!!! Enjoy this time! This sounds like something that could last a loooong time. ;) Gotta love someone who is successful and that you click with! :)

stackingpennies November 24, 2010 at 10:32 AM  

yay! Nice to hear that you found a sweet guy with his dollars in proper order!

Sara November 24, 2010 at 12:03 PM  

That is awesome!! Hope it keeps going well :) Also I know what you mean about the paying - I feel like as an independent woman that provides for myself, I like being able to pay, too!

Anonymous November 24, 2010 at 7:16 PM  

Exciting! Sounds like my hubby and me when we started dating. Trying to think of how often he let me pick up the tab??? hmmmm Just keep offering to pay every time you guys go out...maybe he'll take you up on the offer sometime. But if he keeps insisting on paying, just say "thank you" and enjoy! Good luck and have fun! Excited for you :)

Your SoCal Neighbor

Lulu November 29, 2010 at 12:26 PM  

Congratulations on your new 'boy'!!!!! On the first date I always pay for my food (I ask for separate checks when we order) but one time I went out with a guy who insisted on paying.I left a tip and he got mad about that. Some guys like to pay to show off their provider side I guess.

me in millions November 29, 2010 at 10:23 PM  

Sorry I'm late commenting on this one... but you know I'm rooting for you guys. Things have fizzled with my new boy and there'll be a blog update tomorrow. :(

Bonnie December 1, 2010 at 12:56 PM  

I'm from the South originally so I say, let him pay all the way! :) (Even though my long-term BF and I share expenses, I think it's very important at the beginning to let the man be a gentleman. And if a man balked at paying for at least the first handful of dates, I never saw him again!)

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