Living Life

Life's been non-stop since my last update. It's included awesome nights out with friends, lots of exploring NYC, lax spending habits and...a break up.

That boy I'd been seeing for over a month? Pulled back suddenly and then broke up with me a week ago. Turns out he was also dating someone at work and chose her over me. (Ugh!) Luckily, I stayed really busy last week - but it didn't exactly help because I always fall fast and hard for guys, and this one definitely HURT. At the end of the day, at least it ended sooner rather than later...except I hate that saying! Because it sucks the same for me whether it's a month or 6 months or a 1 year relationship. I like/love/lust hard - always have, always will. Heart on my sleeve, all that stuff. I put all me into something right away and I know I'll never NOT be able to do that. That's just who I am! So when the right guy comes along, it'll all be worth it. :) (It would be nice if he could hurry...I'm also impatient and have a LOT of love in me!)

I've spent a fair amount of money recently on some new clothes, a new winter coat (it SNOWED on October 29th...I'm not ready for that yet!) and a pair of winter boots. And then? I realized I hadn't paid my Nordstrom card on time - and got hit with my FIRST INTEREST CHARGE EVER. Oops! I had ordered a bunch of stuff and sent 75% of it back, so I was waiting for the returns to hit before paying the card - except I wasn't paying attention to the date and November 1 passed before I realized what I had missed. Good thing it was only $2.77...at the end of the day, not THAT bad and a lesson learned!

I ended up having a great weekend (despite a Friday night of much-needed wallowing/me time) with friends. We all went out on Saturday which I needed. I couldn't be more grateful for them! On Sunday a group of us spent 3+ hours cheering for all of the NYC Marathon runners on 1st Avenue! It was so inspiring to watch all these people pushing themselves to accomplish the 26.2 miles through all the boroughs. I can't wait to cheer again next year! I would personally never do it, I'm not a runner and never have been - but I have total and complete respect/awe for everyone who completed it! (Including Ethan Zohn, who I saw run by!)

This week, I'll just be going to the gym a lot and reading... I was able to get Game of Thrones Book One from the New York Public Library on my Kindle and I am completely hooked! I'm reading it at almost every free moment and even turning down my favorite shows to read. It's been a while since I've been that into a book, and I love getting completely lost in a story of epic proportions! I also need to shore up my October budget and start thinking about Christmas!

Other items:

• Considering re-joining Match.com. (It's been 2 years since I used that site, the matchmaker doesn't have any more matches for me "right now" and I've never had anything come to fruition from using OKCupid in the past.)
• I made brownies using a pre-made Trader Joe's mix over the weekend. I'm not a dessert person (except ice cream and creme brûlée!) so this was strange...I even added Nutella and chocolate chips to them!
• I'm going to Atlantic City this Saturday-Sunday with my friends and I can't wait. Gambling? No. Okay, fine, maybe some penny slots... Dancing? Definitely!
• Daylight Savings Time... sunny at 7am and pitch black by 5pm. I'm nervous for the impending winter but also excited! I just hope it doesn't mean being completely holed up all the time...
• My Roth IRA that I opened 3 years ago at Vanguard is showing me a 3-year rate of return of 12.1%! How exciting!
• Home to Seattle for Thanksgiving in two weeks and I cannot wait. I seriously need family time and getting away from the city for 4.5 days will be great. Then Christmas a month later! Need to funnel any extra money into my Gift Fund this month and next.

Another Weekend Getaway (+ About a Boy)

September has been a very busy month for me! I moved into my new apartment, my Mom came to visit, I went back to San Diego on vacation and now I'm off for another brief weekend getaway to the Midwest for my best friend's brother's wedding. It's just Friday-Sunday but it'll be a blast! The wedding on Saturday is an all-day event with a morning ceremony, brunch, various afternoon activities (golf or spa) and then an evening reception. And of course I'm excited to spend time with my best friend! It'll be a weekend full of laughter and fun for sure. :)

So...about this boy. I've started dating someone as of a week ago. It's brand new and I'm quite possibly jinxing myself by blogging (and tweeting) about it already...but I don't care. I'm super, ridiculously happy! We were set up by a matchmaker, which is crazy in and of itself. (A few months ago, on a night where I might've had an extra glass of wine, I decided on a whim to try something different from all the online dating I've done previously...and this is what I found! I signed up as a free member.) Our first date was a blind date to me since I'm not the paying customer so I wasn't privy to a picture of him, but I was intrigued. I knew next to nothing about him except his first name, age, height and where he worked. He called me two days before to set up the date and suggested an Italian restaurant. I was excited and nervous because I'd never been on a blind date before!

The date was good. Not great or amazing or outstanding, but fairly solid. We had a lot in common (travel, being active, food and being family-oriented) and the conversation flowed easily. We took a cab together from the restaurant to my apartment where he dropped me off, gave me a hug and said he had a good time. Not 20 minutes later I received a text from him saying he knows he's not supposed to ask me out until after feedback (with the matchmaker) but that he had a great time and would like to go out again. I agreed and we ended up going out two days later, which hands down ended up being the best date I've ever been on. We went rock climbing so we met up in our workout clothes and talked non-stop. I loved the fact that we were doing a fun and challenging activity as a date! After that, he suggested grabbing some food so I took him to one of my favorite restaurants where we ended up getting a bunch of empanadas and splitting a pitcher of sangria. We stayed up talking until 4:30 in the morning! Definitely the longest second date I've ever been on. :)

And we've been out two more times since then, once for a quick dinner after work and then he cooked me dinner at his apartment. We are definitely in the exciting, fun, I-want-to-learn-everything-about-you phase. By the way, who goes on four dates in one week?! Honestly, though, it hasn't even felt like a week - it's felt like we've known each other for months. Which is a feeling I've never had with anyone else before. Now, due to my weekend away and a business trip for him next week, we'll have an entire week apart. Which is a good thing. (Perspective? Absence makes the heart grow fonder?) But he's already told me to leave next Friday open for a date he's already planning.

So, yes. Who knows what'll happen in a week or a month or whatever...but I'm living in the now and relishing this, because that's what matters!

I Had a Valentine!

I've been dating a boy (dubbed Airport Boy thanks to where we met!) for the past month. A few weeks ago he asked me to be his valentine and of course I said yes. He didn't strike me as the romantic or planning type so I figured we would have a low-key night, maybe cook dinner together or watch a movie. Well, that wasn't quite how the night turned out!

On Valentine's Day, he came over all dressed up (he usually wears jeans and plain t-shirts, needless to say I was stunned as he cleans up WELL!) bearing flowers, my favorite wine and a home cooked meal! He pre-made it at his place as a surprise, since his only instruction to me was to be ready by 6pm. We ate dinner at my place where my roommates were seriously impressed.

About an hour later he told me he also had dessert reservations but would give no hints as to where, other than I would need a warm jacket. We hopped in his car and off we drove...and drove...almost 30 minutes later, after my multiple guesses as to where we were headed, we end up at a hotel. I'm thinking there must be a nice restaurant in the hotel with good dessert. Try again! We were going for an evening GONDOLA RIDE!! He had also brought champagne for us to share and there were complimentary chocolate covered strawberries. The weather was absolutely perfect, the blanket that was provided was comfy and the entire hour we were steered around in the water was bliss. We cuddled close and talked the entire time. It was really romantic, a little bit cheesy (he told me he likes all that stuff for special occasions) and a LOT of fun! I've never done an all out Valentine's Day ever so I LOVED it! Plus it's been three years since I last had a valentine which made it extra exciting. :)

[image via]

Goodbye, New Boy

I knew it was coming, but it still hurts. After realizing that new boy was making excuses all this week and that he was definitely holding back, things ended today. We had a phone conversation and he basically said he wasn't having the feelings for me he should be having, and that he didn't want to drag it out any longer to try to see if something changed. (I've been on both sides of this situation before, so I know that it really sucks to admit it when you really don't want to hurt someone.)

I thanked him for at least having the balls to discuss it with me, even if it wasn't in person. Because we all know the disappearing act sucks. Why do I feel like this year is a repeat of last year dating-wise? But then again, I haven't even had a single relationship at all in 2010! Sigh.

Back to the eHarmony drawing board...

Dating a New Boy

If you follow me on Twitter, you would know that I've been dating a new boy. Yes, he comes from eHarmony, which I signed up for a few months ago. Things are progressing slowly but very well. He's cute, fun and might talk more than I do! (Even though he's the texter and I'm the caller, haha.)

We've been on six dates and have had some impromptu hang outs apart from those. Our first two dates were prior to my 10 day vacation and they were great! Both times he took me to really nice restaurants and both times we talked for ~4 hours, usually the last ones left, barely even noticing that the places were empty! The waitstaff simply left us alone to chat. He's cooked for me once and I've cooked for him, we've gone out to a movie and more recently, we had an awesome Friday night date which included mini golf. :)

As someone who knows that dating can be expensive, especially from a guy's perspective as they tend to pay for the first few dates, I always offer to pay on the third date. Most guys will let me pay for part of the date after I've insisted. New boy has only let me pay for the movie on our fourth date (after much grumbling by him and insistence by me!) as well as the ingredients when I cooked for him, since he had no control over that. (Oh, but he did offer to pick up anything I might need.) When we did three different activities on our most recent date, I offered to pay at each part and he turned me down every single time!

The thing is, I know he has a well-paying job, so he can definitely afford it. (I did notice he pays with his debit card all the time, so that's a good thing.) But it's the principle of the matter! As a PF blogger who is in tune with my own finances and tries to be mindful of others, it does bother me a bit... but then again, it feels really nice to find someone who is successful, so giving and such a gentleman who wants to take care of me. :)

eHarmony

So, I bit the bullet tonight and signed up for eHarmony! I haven't been on a date since May or seriously dated someone since last October and it's been bugging me, much like what me in millions posted about recently. Over the past month, I've been hearing a lot more about eHarmony from two girlfriends in NYC who are using it and friends of friends who have had success with it. I decided to go for it since it's the one popular dating site I haven't tried yet, and I'm paying attention to the signs that keep pointing me towards eHarmony... including two coworkers who met their spouses using it!

Over Labor Day they are offering one of their occasional "free communication" weekends... aka their awesome marketing ploy at getting people to sign up and pay! I know there are decent discounts around, so I'll test it out and see if I decide to go all-in. I'm ready for a relationship!

[images via & via]

Updates!

In bullet point form!

• Studying, studying, studying... I've been doing practice exams and problems. My scores aren't quite where they need to be to pass, but I'm not giving up. 3 weeks to go, I'm hitting it hard!
  
• My finances are still doing good. I have almost invested $4,000 into my Roth IRA for 2009! I might even be able to make it to the fully-funded $5K mark. I also treated myself to some much-needed shopping (retail therapy, anyone?!) recently... $280 on 2 new pairs of high heels and 1 pair of rain boots plus $23 on a new sweater. (And I opened a store credit card in the process - but it's where I do 80% of my shopping, no annual fee, rewards and of course I'll pay it off in full each month!)
  
• I have a few Christmas presents done... Mom, Dad and roommates. Still need to buy for friends and brother.
  
• I had a few car expenses this month for tab renewal and new insurance. Thank goodness for my car fund!
  
• The guy I was recently dating for a month pulled the disappearing act on me out of nowhere, just after Halloween. I was really falling for him, so it was (is!) both confusing and depressing. I'm just glad I have my studying and great friends to lean on when my heart is hurting. Sigh. :(
  
• I'm going home for Thanksgiving and Christmas! I can't wait to see my parents and my brother soon for extended periods of time. Both breaks will be much needed, though Thanksgiving will mostly be devoted to studying.

Saturday Night Date!

If you follow me on Twitter, you would know that I went on a date last night!

It was a blast! He is funny, outgoing, talkative and intelligent. The sushi was good and the restaurant was awesome. The waiters didn't even care that we sat there talking for over half an hour after we (well, he) had paid for our meal, and we had been there for 3 hours already!

He already brought up going out on another date when he walked me to my car, and said he would call me. I can't wait to hear from him! :)

Post-Break Up Update

The weekend was really difficult. I basically holed myself up, let myself grieve for the loss of my relationship with K, then got very angry and today am starting to find peace. Slowly.

I threw away the toothbrush he left here and moved the few pictures of him/us into a folder of a folder. I've told all my closest friends about what happened. And everyone has told me I am better off. Which I know I am. But still, as with anything difficult, there's a process of going through all the emotions. (And to be honest, this is the first time I've had my heart legitimately broken. It's a horrible feeling!)

I spent $4.18 for dinner at In-N-Out on Friday with two friends, $37.87 on groceries (including my favorite ice cream and a $5-per-lb. bag of my favorite cherries), $13 on a few items at the pharmacy and $16.95 on a yoga mat that I have already used once.

And readers, thank you! All your kind comments have been nothing short of amazing! :)

Break Up

I broke up with K.

We had been dating for 4 months, and for the last 1.5 months he pulled away and I saw his true colors. In the end, he turned into a complete jerk and I realized it is better for me to be alone than to be together with him and unhappy almost all the time. The first 2.5 months of our relationship were amazing, but the constant tears, fights/arguments and lack of communication for the last 1.5 months has been too much to handle.

I know this is good for me - once I get over the heart break... :(

Weekend Spending

Basically, I had one of the most amazing weekends of my life. As usual, I spent all weekend with K. On Friday we went out with a few of my friends for a birthday celebration and had a blast! That night, K said he would like it if I would call him my boyfriend! So, it's official, we are together instead of just dating. :) On Saturday we went to brunch and then on a 3-hour hike in a local state park and along a long stretch of beach. My legs and feet were so tired and sore the next day! But it was a blast. On Sunday after brunch we drove our cars to his place and washed them by hand - music turned up loud, in the sunshine, and having a great time together. I couldn't be happier right now!

Friday
$25.79, Gas
$0, Bars (K paid!)

Saturday
$0, Brunch (K paid)

Sunday
$11.98, Brunch
$41.54, Birthday present for my brother

Total: $79.31

Dinner & a Movie!

Last night, K and I went on yet another date. It was dinner and a movie, and I offered to pay for dinner. He's paid for all our dates so far except when we went to the driving range last weekend. However, that $10 isn't exactly much! It's 2009 - the guy doesn't have to and shouldn't pay for everything! (Especially in this economy.) But he insisted on paying for the movie, which I gladly accepted. :)

Dinner: $64.38 (We both had leftovers - hooray! But our drinks were a disappointment.)
Movie: $22 (Go see I Love You, Man! It was hilarious! K paid.)
Starbucks: $0 (via Starbucks gift card I had)

Weekend Spending Report / Dating Update

I basically spent all of my weekend with K as we continue to date and get to know each other. I went to his place on Friday after work to hang out. We tried to go to the driving range but the pro shop was closed so we played around on the putting green for a while. He cooked dinner, a chicken and vegetable stir fry and we ended up just watching Fight Club and talking all night. On Saturday morning we went to brunch and then finally did go to the driving range! He came over to my place later that evening and one of my crockpot meals turned out terrific. Neither of my roommates were around, so we just watched some romantic comedies, played cards and had a few drinks. Sunday morning I went to the gym then ran some errands and bought my Dad's birthday present plus a card. My Gift Fund is being drained for this, but obviously it's for my father so it's completely worth it. :)

Friday
$0, Dinner at K's

Saturday
$10, Driving Range

Sunday
$15.21, Trader Joe's
$105.61, Shirt from Nordstrom for my Dad (coming out of my Gift Fund)
$3.98, Drugstore (card for my Dad)

Total: $134.80

I Guess We're Dating!

K and I went on yet another date on Friday night! We went mini golfing ($16 for the 2 of us, he paid) and sadly - I lost! We ended up betting on who would win, and since he won, he gets to choose one of our next dates - lol! So, we are planning on going either kayaking or rock climbing soon. K is very athletic and outdoorsy: he loves to surf, kayak, rock climb, hike, camp, ski, and golf! It's great because I want to do more activities like that, but none or very few of my friends have the same interests - or we are just too lazy to organize it all!

He also came to the BBQ party my roommates and I threw on Saturday. He met all of my very close friends, which was fun. What's interesting is that he has a very quiet/soft-spoken personality - but doesn't seem to mind that I am very outgoing and talkative! His humor is very similar to mine (and my friends') which is great - even if he doesn't say much in larger groups of people. (My brother and Dad are the EXACT same way. Weird.)

K stayed until almost midnight on Saturday. We got take out (I paid for something - finally!) and watched a movie after the BBQ ended. He asked me what my plans were for this week and suggested we cook dinner together. I love the idea because I like to cook and like learning from other people. We might do something on Tuesday night for St. Patrick's Day, too.

So far, so good! :)

Another Date?!

I mentioned an interesting development earlier this week. Basically, I still check my Match.com account every few days - I paid for 3 months, so why not?! Well, last weekend, I had a long message from a guy that basically has everything in common with me. I decided to give it a shot! We met up last night for coffee and talked from 8pm-11pm. The conversation was good - but something was missing. He was cute, but fairly awkward. There wasn't that spark, there was barely any laughter and it was definitely not as comfortable as it could have been. I got a delicious chai out of the meeting and was able to relate to someone who has traveled to more countries than I have! I am not even sure if I will hear from him again - we said goodbye at my car and parted ways, without even a hug. He is a nice guy and I do wish him all the best.

So, I am still open to potential new dates - however, things are slowly developing with K and I am liking it! Friday will be great: happy hour with my roommates and some friends, mini golf with K and perhaps a movie after! :)

Date #3

K and I went on our third date last night! We went out to dinner in his neighborhood (about a 20 minute drive from where I live) and then took a stroll on the boardwalk. (Well, more like talked and made out along the boardwalk...) He invited me over to his place to watch a movie, but by then it was almost 9pm and I had to get up early for a doctor's appointment. I definitely had a good time, even without the movie. :)

Our next plans are for miniature golf on Friday night! We both like to golf but don't want to be embarrassed on the driving range (yet) so this will be a fun activity instead of just dinner and a walk.

I do like the fact that this is not getting too intense too quickly. We are both very independent people so I don't mind the extended time between dates. However, I do have an interesting development that I'll post about in the next few days.

Date #2

I guess I should give him an initial, now that we've been on date #2. We'll call him K. (He has the same first name as one of my roommates, lol.)

Again, I had a blast last night. He called at 8pm to let me know that due to the event he was at, he wouldn't be able to pick me up until 9pm, was that too late? I said no, it was fine. He asks again if I'm sure - and I ask him if he's really giving me the option to change my mind?! "Oh, dangit, no! I'll see you at nine then." ;)

We went for frozen yogurt (fro yo, as the trend is known here in southern California) and then decided to take a walk on the beach! We held hands and talked about our families, siblings, college days gone by and travel. Very cheesy but it was cute.

He's at a work conference all weekend, so our next date will be dinner on Monday. I'm having a ton of fun right now! :)

2nd Date Already!

The guy I went on a date with last night called me tonight. I didn't expect to hear from him so soon! He said, "I know that I'm probably breaking some rule and that I should probably wait 3 days to call you but I wanted to ask you out again because I had a good time last night." Well... I say screw the rules! :)

We made plans to go out for frozen yogurt on Wednesday night. Should be fun!

PoF Date #1 (aka Online Date #3)

Third time's the charm? :)

I went on my first Plenty of Fish (PoF) date tonight and third online date. I had a lot of fun! He was just as cute in person as in his pictures. (And told me he thought I was a lot cuter in person!) We had some drinks at a happy hour event and then went to dinner, of which he let me have the leftovers. Yum! (It was an oriental fusion restaurant.)

He did kiss me at the end of the night and we have a lot in common. Including having graduated from the same small university?! Go figure! He kept hinting at a second date, but I'll believe it when it happens - though it could be as soon as Tuesday or Wednesday based on our dinner conversation. It didn't hurt that the weather was absolutely perfect and our drinks were delicious!

Here's to crossing my fingers! :)

Match Date #2

I went on my 2nd Match.com date tonight.

His pictures were a lot more attractive than he was in person. (They were also side views of his face.) It was fairly awkward. All he did was make jokes. I don't mind the occasional punchline, but really... this was a bit much. Every 2 seconds. I ended up laughing most of the time - I have a great laugh - but this was the I-am-so-uncomfortable-I'll-give-you-a-weird-look-and-awkward-laugh type. Also, asking me how many Match dates I've been on so far within the first 5 minutes of our date and then "bragging" that he had been on more than me? Uh, not exactly good date etiquette. Plus then proceeding to tell me about all of his prior dates. Mum's the word?! Apparently not...

He was nice enough and paid for our drinks/appetizer (happy hour, 2 rounds, came to $20). Let's just say I don't plan on seeing him again anytime soon. When I was driving home, I realized that he reminded me of an ex-boyfriend and an ex-boss rolled into one: aka not my type at all. (Hence the "ex's.")

Oh, the joys of dating!